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Hippies, Dems 'Burned Up' Over Flag Amendment
For hippies, democrats and other malcontents, summer is traditionally the peak flag-burning season of the year. But a push by Republican Senators to pass the Flag Protection Amendment may pour cold water on solstice celebrations, veggie cookouts and other warm-weather gatherings that typically feature flag burning as a main event.
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Most Massachusetts Marriages on Verge of Collapse
It has been just over two years since a tribunal of
black-robed Massachusetts judges set out to undermine traditional
marriage. Now say a growing number of experts, most marriages in that
state are teetering on the verge of collapse. It is predicted that by
2013, the majority of adults in Massachusetts will be 'hooking up with'
or married to at least one same-sex partner.
Continue reading "Most Massachusetts Marriages on Verge of Collapse" »
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Most Americans Confused About Who to Hate This Summer
As Americans begin the busy summer driving season, a new poll reveals that most are confused about who they should hate and why. While last summer's 'must hate' favorites, including war-critics Cindy Sheehan and Michael Moore, are now regarded as hated has-beens, few new 'hateables' have captured the public's attention.
Continue reading "Most Americans Confused About Who to Hate This Summer" »
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Cleaned Up 'K-Fed' May Seek Office
Kevin Federline is contemplating a run for office, say sources
close to the aspiring performer, best known for his role as the husband
of Britney Spears. 'K-Fed,' who often blasts California liberals in
private, is now looking to take that criticism public and may challenge
democratic representative Henry A. Waxman in next fall's congressional
election. First step on the campaign trail: a new clean-cut, more
professional look.
Continue reading "Cleaned Up 'K-Fed' May Seek Office" »
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President George W. Bush is encouraging the Senate to focus on one of the deadliest scourges facing the nation today: the 'death tax,' which devastates tens, even dozens of Americans every year. Mr. Bush is urging Senators to feel compassion for the afflicted families, whose fois gras consumption and thread counts have plummeted in recent years.
Continue reading "'Death Tax' More Deadly than Gout, Polo Injuries Combined" »
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'Mark of the Beast' Day Has White House Planning for Rapture
6/06/06, otherwise known as '666' or 'Mark of the Beast' day, is cause for celebration among Satanists, teacher unions and in the nation's Godless urban centers. But among key Bush administration figures there is great concern that today could mark the start of 'The Rapture,' in which President Bush and millions of other Christians are summoned up to heaven.
Continue reading "'Mark of the Beast' Day Has White House Planning for Rapture" »